Happy Pride Month, my (gender neutral) dudes!

In this special month of June, I'd like to present an anthology written by queer folks and benefitting queer veterans. The anthology, released TODAY, is called Don't Ask, Ghosts Tell. You can find the paperback, ebook, and associated materials on the publisher's website here. My story is "The Scold's Bridle," and I actually like this one.

That queer horror anthology I mentioned back in July now has a release date! And a cover! As you might remember, the title is Don't Ask, Ghosts Tell. As you will now remember, it releases on June 3, 2025. In case you missed the Kickstarter, I will post a link to order the book once it's live. I'm digging this anthology in particular because it is a charity publication. Proceeds will go to The Modern Military Association of America, which supports LGBTQ+ military members and veterans. Writing and words have meaning and effect. Nothing is truly screamed into the void. ​

​I am back at work at a local library. I still love it overall, even though I have mixed feelings on some aspects. Supporting libraries is such important work, both as a patron and as an employee. There's a lot more to libraries than physical books. There are often ebooks, movies and television shows on disc and streaming, audiobooks, museum passes or discounts, social workers, community events, crafts for children, and resources to help small businesses. I fricking love libraries. 

Nowadays, so many are under attack. Not to get too political (right away, at least), but I am so fearful of defunding public libraries. They're essential for community wellbeing and spreading knowledge. Not everyone will agree with every published book out there, and that's okay. Those disagreeable books still deserve to exist. Two ideas can be true at the same time. If you don't have a library card already, I encourage you to sign up for one soon. Most of the time you just need proof of your address. And if they don't have an item you really want, they can most likely get it for you from another library! 

What are you waiting for? Go get your library card!

In personal news, I guess it's important to report that I am an engaged lady now. ​

​Embroidering is still my go-to visual craft these days. I'm not doing it often, but at least I'm focused on working on a single gnome project for a friend, so I'm not jumping around a bunch of unfinished ideas. I also started drawing the Dover Demon. I mentioned him in my last update.

​Well, that's all for now, dear readers. Things are pretty frightening right now, globally, locally, politically, environmentally, etc. Take care of yourselves and the ones you love, and at least respect those you don't love. I wish you all times of peace and contentment. 

​Do you remember in my last post when I said I graduated from the University of New Hampshire with an MFA? Well, even if you don’t remember, I still did it, and I recently got my diploma in the mail. So that chapter of my life is over. It’s odd not to be a student for the foreseeable future, but it’s also a huge accomplishment. I can admit that, despite it being awkward to say. 

Following up from another big piece of news in my last post, I am proud to report that the paperbacks and ebooks for Slay and Slay Again! are available for purchase and download! You can find all the purchase links here. If you’re inclined to review or track your progress with Goodreads, you can  do so here. The editors at Sliced Up Press did a great job compiling these queer horror stories, and I am honored to be featured in the collection.

Also of note is the news that I sold two more stories for publication! One will be published in another queer horror anthology, and the other will be in a general dark fiction anthology. Anthologies are great opportunities for readers to find new authors and for authors to find new readers.
​
The queer one, titled Don’t Ask, Ghosts Tell, will be funded through a Kickstarter launching in September. You can sign up for notifications here.

The not explicitly queer anthology will be from Sley House Publishing, also due to release at some point next year. I’ll share the preorder links when I get them.

Let’s see . . . What else can I ramble about? Hmm. I’ve been in love with embroidering lately. I’m not too good at it, but it’s interesting and fun. You can see a sample of a piece I made on the artwork tab, right over here. Since completing that skink portrait, I’ve learned a few new stitches, and I’m excited to try them out. I think I’ll do a portrait of the Dover Demon, which I learned about at the International Cryptozoology Museum in Portland, Maine. He’s just a little scamp.
​
What have you been invested in lately, dear reader?

It’s taken quite some time to get here, but I made it. I officially have my Master’s degree! Well, I don’t have the paper yet, but I did finish all my classes and work and such.

After spending about a year stressing about my thesis – and occasionally writing it – I successfully defended it and read an excerpt from it in April. It’s 150 pages of short stories with the beginning of a novella at the end. I wish I could have gotten more support while writing it, but maybe it proves something that I could still pull it off on my own. Of course, the original idea was to complete the novella, which I found I couldn’t do alone, but I still ended up with over 200 pages of material. That’s pretty impressive.

I am grateful to my family and friends for supporting me through these years, whether it was through emotional support, cosigning loans, helping me get to and from campus, or anything else. A few people from outside the program even showed up for my reading, which was lovely.

Let’s talk about the reading, shall we? As you might imagine, I was shaking terribly for hours before the event started. I felt like I was on the brink of death. But I made it through. My thesis advisor introduced me with a very complimentary speech about my work. He even compared a certain story to Edgar Allan Poe! And he said that I changed his view on what horror can do.

That last bit really touched me. Going into a literary MFA program, I knew the professors would lean away from “genre” fiction. (I can go on and on about why I put that word in quotation marks, but I won’t bore you.) The first workshop story I submitted was intentionally much more “literary” than my usual because I wasn’t sure how my weird stuff would be received. It was . . . a bad story. It’s currently sitting in my graveyard folder of abandoned stories, where it shall remain for ever more. For the next cycle, I decided to just write and submit a “genre” story, and it turned out well. I was more passionate about and comfortable with what I had written. It showed in the quality of my work. And, to my delight, the professor still found worthy aspects in the story, regardless of the supernatural and murder elements.

Even though my writing tends toward “genre” and “speculative,” there is still merit in it. Genre and spec fic are so popular and loved because they’re interesting. That isn’t to say that literary fiction isn’t interesting, but it is, by default, more realistic, which can bore some folks. In contrast, farfetched situations might alienate some readers, so genre isn’t for everyone either. In the end, popularity doesn’t equate worth. Charles Dickens, for example, was and is incredibly popular, but he’s not seen as cheap. Let’s not forget his famous ghost story either. E. L. James is incredibly popular too, and while the 50 Shades series is absolutely not my thing, it still gets people to engage with fiction. Yes, many people look down on James and her style of writing (I personally have read some excerpts that are simply appalling on many levels), but the books exist and deserve to exist. The point is that I won’t spit at her writing because it’s popular.

Going back to the public reading I did, it was a huge accomplishment for me. Reading out loud, even to myself, is difficult. I feel silly and I stumble on my words. But it was part of the program requirements, so I had no choice. I really dreaded it. There’s a peculiar trait that many authors share, myself included, which entails wanting one’s writing to be out there and to be read but also wanting to hide it and themselves in the shadows. Why not publish anonymously or pseudonymously? Because we want to beknown for our achievements. It’s tricky.

Being complimented by my thesis advisor was a double-edged sword too. On one hand, I felt somewhat competent. My writing had reached at least one person! And it even changed their perspective on horror! What a compliment. On the other hand, imposter syndrome hit hard, as well as the discomfort of being seen. It was awkward.

But, again, I made it through. If you’d like to see some pictures from my time in the program, you can look at my professional and personal* Instagram profiles.

Oh, right, one more thing. Remember that publication I mentioned in my last post? Well, ebook preorders are now available! You can preorder from a whole lot of different retailers, all listed here. Paperback copies are coming soon, so I hear. The release date is July 31, 2024. Mark those calendars! 

*I haven't made a personal post yet, as of May 4, but it's a-coming.

P.S. I lied. Here's another thing. I now have a logo! It was designed by the incredibly talented art student Fiia Salomaa. It has a skull, a lizard, ace pride colors, and my name. What more could I want?

Greetings and salutations, friends! A lot has happened since October 2023, both globally and personally. Let's focus go chronologically, focusing on the personal.

On October 13, 2023, I went to New York Comic Con. I'd been to a couple tiny conventions previously, but this was huge and overwhelming. It was worth the stress, though, because I met Tim Curry and Susan Sarandon! If you know even a bit about me, chances are that you've heard about my longstanding hyperfixation on Rocky Horror (the stage show, the movie, the various adaptations of both, etc.). When I was 15 or 16, I met Barry Bostwick, Patricia Quinn, and Nell Campbell at a small convention, and that was thrilling. But I never thought I'd get to meet Tim Curry or Susan Sarandon. They don't often attend cons, since cons are expensive and scary even without photo opportunities. Still, I knew this would be one of my last chances to meet them, if not the last chance, so I had to do it. It all moved very quickly. I hardly had the chance to thank them, tell them that Rocky Horror changed my life, and express my love. I did try, of course, and Susan Sarandon smiled sweetly. I am so grateful to my friends for helping me actually do it. Without the pushing, I likely would have missed the opportunity. The picture below is the result of that marvelously exhausting day.

Let's skip ahead to February 2024. I went to one of the biggest traditional writing and publishing conferences as a representative for my MFA program's literary journal, Barnstorm. I love being the fiction editor for the journal, and the AWP conference was an important experience. A good experience, though? A beneficial one? Not so much. Although the conference made statements about being accessible to writers with disabilities, the reality was much different. It was an overwhelming conference, and I could have gotten so much more out of it if they actually fulfilled their promises. Or if I was neurotypical. You can read more about the disappointing conference, and how we can work toward true accessibility, here. 

Onward! March 2024. Also known as the current month. I just signed the contract for my first paid fiction publication. My story "An Offering of Meat" will be published in the anthology Slay and Slay Again by Sliced Up Press. I actually like this story and I am psyched to share it with the world. The fact that I got paid for it also makes me feel good. The anthology should be published in June 2024. You can be sure that I'll post updates and links when they become available. 

Hello, faithful readers and friends. I haven’t sent out a newsletter since . . . June 2022. Yikes. That’s not because things haven’t happened. In fact, a lot has happened. I’m now a student at the University of New Hampshire, in my second year of the MFA in Writing program, and I love it. I’m also the head fiction editor at Barnstorm Journal, the university’s graduate student-run literary journal. We have a new issue out today (the first one I edited!), and it would be swell if you took a look at it. Volume 15, Issue 1, is available here. Oh, yeah, and I have a 150-page thesis due in January. Don't ask me how that's going.

But those personal notes are not my only reasons for writing today!

I’m writing to rant on a subject about which I am very passionate. As you may know, I adore theatre, film history, and jazz. Combine the three and you’ve sold at least one ticket to your show. It turns out that there is a new, Broadway-bound musical called Boop! about my beloved Betty Boop. Of course, I have my reservations about the musical, but overall, I’m excited. The casting for Betty was recently announced. Newcomer Jasmine Amy Rogers will be playing the flapper icon. Promote those new talents! Hire those artists of color! Ignore the racists who say that Betty has to be white!

I have a lot to say about that last point, actually.

First, Betty Boop was created by Max and Dave Fleischer, Jewish brothers, one of whom was an immigrant from Poland. Jews have been racialized for centuries, regardless of the individual’s country of origin. The creators’ ethnicity doesn’t dictate the creation’s identity, but if we look into Betty’s appearances, we see more of her. In “Minnie the Moocher” (1932), for example, Betty’s father wears a yarmulke.

But Black folks can be Jewish too! So that doesn’t rule out a Black Betty.

However, a narrative I’ve seen countless times online in regards to Betty’s origins is that she was based on Baby Esther Jones, a Black vaudeville personality. This is where the story gets complicated.

Based on my research, Baby Esther was brought into the picture in the mid-1930s, when Helen Kane sued Fleischer Studios for allegedly stealing her “Boop-Oop-A-Doop Girl” routine. The defense brought in recordings of various performers who also used scat singing and baby talk in their performances, proving that the routine was already widespread and could not be traced to one person. Plus, the specific footage of Baby Esther was from December 1928, months before Kane even started her “Boop-Oop-A-Doop” time.

This evidence leads many people to believe that Baby Esther must have been the primary influence on Betty. But let’s look deeper.

What is Betty Boop if not a sex symbol of the Jazz Age? Not much, honestly. After the Hays Code went into effect in 1934, forcing Betty to tame herself, Pudgy (yes, the stupid pet dog) became more interesting to audiences and more palatable to censors. So Pudgy stole the show.

Before the Code, though, Betty wore her barely-there dress and revealed her garter – and occasionally her other undergarments – and had boyfriends galore. She was supposedly completely nude for one frame in 1932's "Betty Boop's Bamboo Isle." You know who doesn’t dress like that or act like that? An eleven-year-old. And that’s how old Baby Esther was when “Dizzy Dishes” came out in 1930. “Dizzy Dishes” was Betty’s first appearance, and although Betty was a humanoid dog for the first few shorts, she still had sex appeal. I mean, she sings all about her need for lovin’ from a certain “you” in “Dizzy Dishes.”

It is, unfortunately, true that a lot of people sexualize children, especially young girls of color, but the Fleischers would really have had to commit to the bit to base a sexy dog lady on an eleven-year-old.

This all isn't to say that Black culture didn't influence the development of Betty Boop. I mean, it was the Jazz Age. Jazz is a classically Black music genre, and the cartoons certainly had their share of jazzy guest stars, like Cab Calloway (in three shorts!) and Louis Armstrong. It would be impossible to be an icon of such a time and place and be totally separate from Black culture. You could try, sure, but the effect would likely turn out to be purposeful whitewashing.

What's the point of this rant? I guess I just want to put out the word that Betty Boop was and is more than one thing. Part of her is Baby Esther, part is Helen Kane, and part is generic flapper, among other influences. She developed, as everything does, into more than what she set out to be (a companion to Bimbo, who was a dog). She can be played by anyone on stage or in cosplay or in any other circumstance. I'm excited to see Jasmine Amy Rogers take on the iconic role.

I don't like to spread misinformation, so I've done quite a bit of research over the years on Betty Boop. I grew up watching her cartoons with my father, and my love for them never died (although I am now unable to watch them without crying). I encourage you to look at this website for more in-depth articles. Their cited sources are good too. Oh, and Smithsonian Magazine also has a good article here.

That's all for now! Make sure you click through the links throughout this post to watch videos, read articles, and explore Barnstorm Journal.

Until next time, my friends.

It's been a while. I've had COVID. I've written a couple stories (yet to find homes) and articles over on Horror Press. I got a job at a local library. I decided on a grad school (take two). But most recently, I made an appearance on a new podcast!

In high school and college, I was involved with the school radio programs. Man, I loved being on air. This podcast experience was quite a bit different than queueing up and talking about music, though.

My lovely writing buddy Laura Nettles recently launched a podcast called Twisted Tendrils: Horrific Writing Advice. As you might guess, it specializes in horror writing-oriented discussions. The episode I helped with, number eleven, is titled "The Importance of Sadness in Horror," and we talk about mental health, its representation in horror, and why we might be drawn to "the feels." I had so much fun talking with Laura about this matter that is so dear to me. Even if you're not a horror writer or a writer of any sort, there's still value in this discussion. 

You can find the podcast wherever you usually listen to them. Here are a couple links: 

• Laura's website
• Apple Podcasts link
• Spotify link

Once you give it a listen, I'd love to know your thoughts! Leave a comment on the podcast itself or on my website, send me an email, or catch me in person sometime.

​Until next time, my dudes . . . 

Not only did I get my first professional writing gig, but it's for a horror-dedicated website that is live as of today! Here's a link to my articles, with more on the way: https://horrorpress.com/author/amanda/ 

I am thrilled to have this job. As you all should know, I love spooky crap, so Horror Press is a perfect outlet for my thoughts. I've only done movie reviews so far, but there's a board game review coming down the pipe and hopefully some book reviews in the future.

Feel free (or encouraged) to show your support by reading, commenting, and sharing. Just be aware that the website is too new to have passed Facebook and Instagram's community standards, so my linktree will be a better option for sharing. Here it is: https://linktr.ee/amandanevadademel 

​As always, I appreciate everyone's support. I hope to share more good news soon!

The official release date for the anthology Howls from Hell is . . . today! You can read my short story "Duplicitous Wings" within its haunting pages. Accompanying each story is a delightfully creepy illustration by one of the HOWL Society members. My story was captured in art form by Joe Radkins. He's so talented (as are all the authors and artists involved, but I have a personal connection to this specific piece of his). 

"Duplicitous Wings" is a tale about family and revenge, primarily. Although it's not as intense or "deep" as some of my other work, I still like this fun romp of a story. I'd love to hear your thoughts!

You can get the anthology in paperback or as an ebook. The paperback is only available on Amazon (right now, at least), but the ebook is available from a plethora of vendors. You can also check the Writing page on this very blog for more links.

Hello, dear readers and friends! What a fine year this is turning out to be! (Not really . . . the pandemic is still raging, the US bombed Syria just a little over a month into the new administration, a bunch of Jews dressed in blackface for Purim, etc. But here's to hope?)

Depressing news aside, I have an exciting announcement. I will be published in another anthology! Titled Howls from Hell, this anthology features horror stories from members of my book club (the Horror-Obsessed Writing and Literature Society, or HOWLS for short) and a foreword from the fabulous Grady Hendrix. The cover reveal is today, March 5, and the publication date is May 18. You can preorder it here. By preordering, you will not only be supporting me, but also a bunch of other upcoming writers. What better way to show support than by reading our work?

Oh, also, I got accepted into grad school for a creative writing program. So that's good too.

Wow, would you look at that? Only four and a half days left of 2020 (for those in Eastern Standard Time, at least). What a nightmare this year has been. We, as a planet, have dealt with COVID, countless deaths of loved ones and public figures, wild fires spreading out of control, and incompetent governmental leaders, among other crises. There have been moments of light, too. It's important that we don't overlook those.

A personal moment of light came in the form of simply surviving the year. My depression, though still severe, has not taken over. I have motivation more days than not. I am able to get out of bed, to write, to draw (most days). When I feel myself getting to a very dark, very familiar place, I've been working on telling myself, "No, you don't actually want to do this. You aren't where you once were. This is a set back. Recovery is not a straight line." My therapist has been working with me on self-compassion. Let me tell you, it's difficult. I like to joke that I don't have low self-esteem, I have no self-esteem. I think it's funny, even if it is a problem.

Another ray of light was from my main project of the year: applying to graduate school. As of a couple weeks ago, all applications have been submitted! I am filled with relief, accomplishment, and crushing dread. I know it's a big deal to have even applied. It was a long, difficult process. In fact, it was so difficult that I was tempted to give up a few times. I was frozen by fear, by self-doubt, by imposter syndrome. But in the end, my desire to go back to the world of academia and my passion for writing were stronger than my fear of rejection.
Huh. Writing that out is weird. I think it's a good weird, though. It's like . . . I am stronger, more determined than I thought. Well done, me.

One more beam of light shone on me yesterday. I started writing a new story! It's been months since I worked on something new. Getting back into the flow of new writing is not easy, considering that I've been editing older work for nearly a year now. ​You know how it is, with mental illness, grad school applications, working two jobs, moving to a new place, and general life responsibilities. I've had ideas for new work, sure, but fleshing out those ideas wasn't a priority. Now that my applications are submitted, I can get into new projects again. It's pleasantly surprising, even if it is challenging.

Dear readers, what events have shed light on you this year? I'd love to hear about an act of kindness, some progress in your occupation, a new hobby, anything. Of course, let's not forget the bad. Without the negative, there is no positive. 12:01 on January 1 isn't going to change everything. It'll be a new year, a new month, a new day, but our traumas and pains will still be present. I just think that we've dealt with enough crap this year. Let's lift each other up. Let's end the year smiling.

It is Halloween! And, boy, does it look strange this year. I had planned on making and wearing a costume this year, but that fell through. Not only do I not have a place to wear it to (thanks, COVID), but I'm working all day and moving into a new house next week. I couldn't even decorate my living space this year! It's a tragedy, I tell you.

There is, however, a silver lining. It's not really about the situation or circumstances, but more about an event. Or, more accurately, a publication.

That's right! I have a new publication!

As I mentioned in a previous blog post, I was writing a nonfiction article for my book club's website. The HOWL Society, as we've named ourselves, recently launched a website, and I had the honor of contributing the first blog post/article. You can read it here. The topic is the appeal of horror fiction. I thoroughly enjoyed writing in a semi-academic tone again and being able to gush about my love for the macabre. 

Another silver lining is that it is my love John Keats's birthday today. If you aren't familiar, he was a poet who lived from 1795 to 1821. He died at age 25 from tuberculosis. Before that, though, he wrote the most gorgeous poetry I have ever read, as well as some of the most romantic (pun intended), heartbreakingly beautiful letters. You can read some of his poems here. 

Lastly, tomorrow is the first day of NaNoWriMo. I don't think I'll get very far this year, what with moving and working and grad school applications and mental health complications, but I will do my best. That's all that matters in the end, isn't it?

So, my dear readers, I will leave you with my best wishes for a terribly terrific Halloween.

You may also be wondering what this image depicts. It is an AlphaSmart 3000, which is a portable word processor from 2002. I got this relic to help with my writing focus.

Instead of being distracted with the Internet and apps and such, I can turn on the AlphaSmart 3000 and type without connecting. I can simply start typing without booting up or opening any programs or tabs. Since it doesn't have any sort of Internet, I can close my laptop and force myself not to get distracted. It also helps with not doing excessive research. Researching before or during writing is excellent, but there is a point where it turns into an escape rather than a help.

You might be wondering why I don't just handwrite to avoid getting distracted. I do write by hand quite often, but it's a pain to type it all up at the end of the day. Imagine handwriting an entire novel and then having to type it up. Yikes. That hassle also gives me an excuse to put off moving forward. I find that handwriting is best in the beginning stages for me, especially with planning the plot and character development.

The AlphaSmart 3000 is incredibly lightweight, and it has a small, matte screen. This makes it perfect to bring around with me and to use outside. Also, it runs on batteries, so I don't need to worry about finding an outlet. 

The last benefit I'll bore you with is about perfectionism. I tend to rewrite words, sentences, paragraphs, pages, even full chapters, plenty of times before I'm somewhat content. Obviously, this habit often prevents me from just writing the next scene. Because of the tiny screen on my new device, I can't easily go back to the beginning of a paragraph and rewrite it. I have to move on. Hopefully using the AlphaSmart will help me break the nitpicking habit. When I'm done with a scene, I can plug the fossil into my computer and transfer the document. It can hold eight documents of about twelve pages each, by the way.

If you're interested in getting one of these not-so-fancy machines, you might have to search around a bit. The product is no longer being made, but you can find used ones online. The going price is around 30 USD at the time of this writing. I got mine on eBay.

Thank you for sticking with me this far. As usual, I have a few parting notes to bestow upon you. 

1. #blacklivesmatter #JusticeForBreonnaTaylor #GeorgeFloyd #SayTheirNames
2. Just because the hashtags are fading from online platforms doesn't mean that the movement is over. In fact, the movement is just beginning. Stay informed. Stay active. Stay vigilant.
3. This pandemic sucks. We all know that. Sometimes all we can do is exist, and that's okay. If you can get out of bed, great. If you can exercise, great. If you can take a shower, brush your teeth, take care of yourself, great. If you're struggling, that's okay too. Be compassionate towards others and towards yourself.

As you may know, May is Mental Health Awareness Month. Mental health has long been a cause about which I am passionate. This year we can't support each other in person (or at least we shouldn't be getting together. STAY INSIDE), but there are resources to help us along. Even if you don't have a diagnosis (which is a classist way of gatekeeping mental illness), and even if you feel fine today, there is no way of knowing what tomorrow holds. Will we get out of this quarantine? Are all our loved ones safe? Will we get our jobs back? Those are just some common concerns of the day. For people with mental illnesses, there are likely many more questions and doubts. Moreover, much of the neurodivergent population is at risk for exacerbated symptoms, if they aren't showing them already. 

It is no secret that I struggle with mental illness. I have a few diagnoses, but as I mentioned before, that is not a legitimate way to classify the state of my health. (More information about the classism of diagnoses here.) It is comforting, however, to be classified . . . for me, at least. Having diagnoses is like knowing that I belong to a community. They are helpful labels for me. They make me realize that I am not alone in my struggle. To me, the most meaningful "official" label I've gotten is bipolar disorder. It explains why I have mood swings, why my days are more unpredictable than many others', why I can go from euphoric and high-energy to despondent and lethargic. Knowing that I am bipolar gives me comfort, but mental illness diagnoses aren't like that for everyone.

Most people are not happy to hear that they have a condition of any sort. Add the stigma  about neurodivergence to that base feeling, and you're likely to see a person rebelling against their nature. We need to normalize mental illness. It is an invisible disability that affects millions of people in the US alone. When we see mental illness in a negative light and criticize those who struggle, we certainly aren't doing them any favors. In fact, those actions make treatment significantly more difficult. And let's not forget the stigma against medication. I've been told so many disgusting things:

• "It's all in your head."
  

Yes, because it's literally a mental issue.

• "It's a cop out to take drugs."

I have a chemical imbalance. These help me level out so that I can get the treatments you so graciously approve of, like therapy.

• "You shouldn't let that crap into your body."
  

You shouldn't let pollution into your body, but you still have to breathe.

• "You think those pills actually do something?"
  

Even a placebo effect can help some people.

• "Feels good, huh?"

The last quotation was said to me as I was taking my nightly pills. The speaker crossed his eyes and smiled as he said it. I was disgusted, but too self-conscious to say anything.

I believe the first step in helping those of us who deal with mental illness is to simply be aware of our struggles. They are real. They are not easily "cured." But we are not lost causes. Be compassionate, be patient with us, and at least try to accept that we deal with additional burdens. This Mental Health Awareness Month, I ask you to think about your perspective on mental illness. Maybe that involves reading some articles. Maybe you need to talk to some neurodivergent friends (And yes, you have them. Everyone does.). You might even consider donating to mental health initiatives. Just, please, do something. We need to come together in these times. Aren't we alienated enough?

Before I go, here are two links for you:

1. A video from the show Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, which deals with mental illness in a very constructive way.
2. The National Alliance on Mental Illness, which provides support and education to those in need, and which works to raise awareness about neurodivergence.

Greetings!

I'm posting today about something I did last week. It was a twelve-hour writing marathon. Due to being out of work, I've been trying to be more productive with my passions. I know that simply surviving in these time is an accomplishment, and that I am not obligated to produce my next great work in quarantine, but I want to be productive. I need to create to survive. This marathon was difficult, tiring, long (obviously), and rewarding. 

So, I woke up one day at 8:30 AM, which is an ungodly hour for me, and I started writing at 9:00. I tried to persevere until 9:00 PM, but it got to be a bit too much around 7:00. I ended up doing a ton of planning on my two novels, conducting a good deal of research, and writing 4,250 words for a couple stories. Yes, it was a perfect 4,250 words! Although I had to give up before twelve hours were done, it still felt great to be so productive. I would have liked to write more than I did, but I'm proud of that number nonetheless.

Overall, the day was fabulous, if exhausting. It showed me that I can sit down and work. It also showed me the benefits of actually setting aside chunks of time for writing. Usually I just write when I get the inspiration or when I have the time. Yes, I know that almost all successful authors say you have to write everyday, and I have been trying to do that, but setting aside the time is so important. Especially giving myself big slots of time, not just 45 minutes or so. With some more practice, I think I could make it to the twelve-hour mark. The marathon was such a rewarding experience.

What have you been working on during quarantine? Any big projects? Any small victories? I hope everyone who is reading this will find some inspiration to do what they love. Good luck!

(Hey, look down there! It's the word count of one of my novels from the marathon!)

So, it's been almost five months. What can I say? Life takes over. I got a job I loved, and then COVID-19 hit and I was laid off. I suppose the upside of getting laid off is that I have time to write and post again. Still, it would be nice to have an income . . . Oh well. There are thousands of people in my position, and thousands more who are worse off. I'll make it through.

In other news, I submitted to a big writing contest yesterday. I will not say the name because I probably won't get very far in it, and I don't want to disappoint myself or others. The story was a fantasy/horror tale inspired by Macbeth, and I've been working on it since my last semester of college. It has undergone heavy revisions since its inception, and I'm fairly content with the thirteenth draft (the one I submitted). Let's see if the judges are content with it as well.

As previously mentioned, my newly acquired free time provides me an opportunity to create and post. I am surrounded by many drafts of stories, and I have a painting in progress, along with a few drawings. There's also a finished drawing up my sleeve, but I need to watermark it before posting and potentially selling prints. I need to take advantage of this time without putting too much pressure on myself. It's difficult.

I'm going to cut myself off before this post gets too long. Stay safe, everyone! Wash your hands! Practice social distancing! Don't hoard toilet paper!

Greetings! It's almost November, which means it's almost National Novel Writing Month.

Although I've participated four times before (I think), I've been unable to get past 30,000 (ish) words. The goal is 50,000 words, by the way. 30,000 isn't bad, though. In fact, I'm quite proud of that year. 

This year, I will be working on a supernatural suspense novel. It deals with folklore, ghosts, childhood, adulthood, friendship, trust, and death. It's a nice return to my comfort area of horror. The title is still a work in progress, as is the cover. The title will be a challenge, I know, because they almost always are. I am working on cover designs with the talented Virginia deGuzman, who has done some excellent work for me in the past. If you're interested, here is her website. I'm grateful that I don't need to worry about the title or cover until I finish the novel and start to think seriously about publishing.

This month (October), I've been working a great deal on planning. I noticed that planning and keeping track of all the characters, locations, plot points, visuals, etc helped me a great deal that year I got 30,000 words. Let's see how far I get this time.

Until next time, my friends, I leave you with the best wishes for your health and happiness. And, of course, the spookiest wishes for All Hallow's Eve.

Remember the submission to Palamedes Publishing that was due to come out soon? Well, "soon" is today! Okay, maybe the date of publication was actually July 12, but I'm updating everyone now. 

You can purchase the anthology Finding Light in Unexpected Places: An Anthology of Surprises as an ebook on Amazon, iTunes, and Kobo. The Amazon link also has the option to buy the book as a paperback. Isn't that exciting? 

If you want to order the book for a bookstore, or if you want the ISBN number for some other reason, here it is: 978-0-9996930-0-1

My very short piece is about the months after losing my father. I hope I was able to solicit some emotion with my writing. I guess you'll have to let me know.

Again, here are the links:

• https://amzn.to/2ldAD23     (Amazon)
  
• https://geo.itunes.apple.com/us/book/finding-light-in-unexpected-places/id1472838498?mt=11     (iTunes)
  
• https://www.kobo.com/us/en/ebook/finding-light-in-unexpected-places     (Kobo)
  
• https://www.palamedes.pub/books/new     (the publisher's main website)

Allo! I have some exciting news again.

First, that anthology contribution from Palamedes Publishing will be out soon! I just received an email with what my pages will look like, and I submitted my author bio. This is pretty cool. Of course, I'll update again when the book is available to buy.

Second, I have submitted two stories for paid publication in literary magazines. If these get accepted, they will be my first paid gigs! I'm pretty confident in these stories, so I won't be defeated if they are rejected, which is very possible.

Third, I started a full time job (finally). The routine is certainly helping my energy and inspiration levels, but I don't have nearly as much time to write or draw. Strangely enough, I'm actually writing much more than I have been over the past few months.

Fourth, I am working on a zine with a dear friend who is a graphic designer. The content revolves around horror (surprise, surprise). If you are interested in contributing, please contact me! Other authors and visual artists are absolutely welcome to help out.

It's been a while. Sorry about that. But I'm back, and I have news!
First, I am publishing my second short story. The title of this creative nonfiction piece is "Ice Petal Flowers," and it will be published in print. That's very exciting. Palamedes 

This is my official website! Welcome!

I'll try to update this as often as needed, but no promises. I will probably update more often on Instagram and Tumblr. 

Are you interested in buying some crap from me? Excellent! I'll be opening a shop soon. In the meantime, you can donate to the worthy cause of a starving artist/poor college student​. See the "Support Me!" page for more details.